Oscar Recap

Every time I watch an award show, Scot swears it's the last one he'll take in with me.
I have clothing opinions dammit.

Loved 'em

A big ol' N I C E to Demi Moore ! The color was gorgeous, the flow of it ,beautiful, and she just looks fantastic. Guess you had better look hot if your kids and husband are nearly the same age.

Cameron Diaz looked dazzling. I've never been impressed with Cami in interviews; she appears a little "slow." And her hair and demeanor usually matches her Spicoli 'tude. Not last night. Her hair was loose and flowy, but with some intelligent control behind it.

I love Kate Winslet. Even if her dress is a tad boring, I'll forgive her. Makeup is polished, hair is done. And personally, I like knowing she didn't sacrifice breakfast to fit in her dress.

George, you are my Old Hollywood Turkish Delight. One bite of him would make me so much more of a WO-Man. The long locks aren't rocking me, but he's a delicious man, in a tuxedo. It's really that simple. I can forgive the hair.

Hated 'em

J. Lo.- Hated it. Maybe it's that I don't like her. And why was she at the Oscars? A newborn's stuffed animal multiplied on her thigh and now she looks attractive to sleepy babies that want to nuzzle up to her blanket-like appendage. Awful. Overdone. And while I'm bashing on her, there is the problem of Marc Anthony. He looks like he should be harassing his girls out on a seedy Miami street corner. Cheeseball. Slimy.

Vera Farmiga. Refreshing. In an exotic, newbie way. Not in the sherbet way. Elks Lodge 91 in Lincoln, Nebraska called. They want their fan-folded 28 dinner napkins (in berry), back.

SJP. No. No. She has a rocking body. And gorgeous, cascading hair. The frump frock and school marm hair frighten me. I half expect her to be the evil grandmother in LifeTime TV's take on V.C. Andrews "The Flowers in the Attic". She has young children. I wish she would introduce them to the SJP ala "Honeymoon in Vegas." They won't be so afraid of her then.

Mariah. When I first got some boobs (little they are) I wanted to hoist them to the heavens, too. But I was 29 and quickly realized they were just leaking milk bags. And when you have great legs, that could be the body part you choose to highlight. Notice I said "part". ONLY ONE ITEM PER PERSON PLEASE. Sometimes, MORE IS MORE! Shock! Awe. I knew Bob Mackie and other famous designers are designing for Baribie, but I would suggest leaving Barbie Patterns to the Barbie Doll.